The Disease of More

Speaking of wandering, those who do may not be lost. But they may fall ill; ill with something I call the Disease of More. A short story in the Bible called Quail from the Lord illustrates this concept poignantly.

Here’s what happened, roughly speaking:

As Moses led God’s Chosen People—a multitude of six hundred thousand Israelites—out of Egypt and toward the Promised Land, a small faction of elders approached Moses one day.

“Y’know,” they said. “We’ve been wandering in the damn wilderness for a while now, and we’re thankful for the free manna your God continues to provide and all—”

“There’s a but coming, I presume?” Moses said.

The Israelites swung looks at each other, then one said: “Would it kill Him to give us some delicious meat? I mean, don’t get us wrong. Egypt was a hellhole. And Pharaoh was a real peach. But we had a smorgasbord—all at no cost! The fish and cucumbers and melons sure made the tyranny easier to swallow.”

That’s Default.

There’s their self-sabotaging behavior.

The Israelites believed they were, and I’m quoting God here: “better off in Egypt” despite the fact that He was leading them to something better than they could have ever imagined—the gift of freedom; a land of milk and honey. God, through Moses, was showing them The Way out of self-sabotage and toward self-mastery.

The Israelites, like today’s Self-Sabotaging Men, preferred to be the victim in their own story because they couldn’t have a binge of biblical proportions; because they wanted what looked, felt, and tasted like success.

And they wanted more of it.

You can imagine how well their lack of gratitude sat with God. They wanted meat. He gave them meat, all right. A large wind drove in quail to their camp, as far as a day’s walk in any direction.

For the next thirty-six hours or so, the Israelites went out and collected quail.

While they ate—with the meat still between their teeth—God struck them with a severe plague because of their lack of gratitude for the provisions on their way to the Promised Land.

A lack of gratitude is a symptom of Default; of being a victim.

It doesn’t matter if you’re wandering.

It doesn’t matter if you’re not lost.

It doesn’t matter if you’re eating manna from the hand of God.

Why doesn’t it matter?

Because for the Self-Sabotaging Man, it’s never enough. Their lack of gratitude and victimhood makes them fall ill with the Disease of More.

More money.

More women.

More notoriety.

More success.

Default loves it when you want more, because you could be just one more want away from self-sabotage.